match v Cainers 2016

Result: victory, oh glorious victory

Score: Cainers all out 90: Alts 91-5

Keen followers of The Alternatives understand this fixture. They understand the history, the drama, the ignominies and, for the Alternatives, too rare glory. The white-hot cauldron that can extinguish a callow soul or smelt raw talent into a refined product.

This year would prove no different.

The conditions were harsh. Cloudy grey skies with scattered showers looked over a sticky, troublesome wicket and slow, burdensome outfield. No gifts or pleasures were to be given, just earnt. The teams faced each other in these unglamourous and forbidding circumstances, liked two bare-knuckled prize fighters brawling in the backroom of a backstreet bar with old bloodstains scarring the floor.

The toss was lost and The Cainers elected to bat. Their openers were familiar to The Alternatives and had wreaked much damage in the past. But not on this day. No, on this day the bowlers showed menace with control. First, Spink made the breakthrough with a clattering of The Cainers’ captain’s wicket. Then, Clayson joined the attack and kept an unerring line and length that perfectly suited the conditions.

Then followed one of those sporting moments that can change a match. Bryden on his debut for this fixture, twirled a perfectly pitched spinning delivery onto the edge of The Cainers’ star batsman. The catch was grabbed by Boden behind the stumps and forced the batsman’s forlorn walk back to the pavilion.

The guts of The Cainers’ batting had been sliced open. Though they battled, wickets tumbled at a steady pace. Each bowler maintained the firm grip, and unlike previous years, the pressure and dominance was not relinquished.

Both Goodwin and Alex (also on his fixture debut) took crucial wickets. But the fielding highlight must be the diving catch by Bryden. Standing in gully, he dived full length to hold on to the wet, slippery ball, struck at fierce speed, to the open-mouthed astonishment of the batsman.

The Cainers managed to get to 90 before the last wicket fell. Generally regarded as a below-par total but still could prove reasonable on a slow and difficult pitch.

The start of The Alternatives’ innings would prove crucial. The clattering of early wickets in the previous year had really cost The Alternatives, and this year the opposition’s bowling was better still.

Both Green and Chappell defended carefully, knowing that there were plenty of overs to score the low total but the preservation of wickets was more important to stop any panic in the ranks.

Green fell with the partnership close to 30 but the solid start had been guaranteed. Then, Chappell accelerated and played an assured, calm innings. Eventually he was run-out for 27, hampered by a dodgy hamstring, but his measured innings set the confident tone much required after last year’s hammering.

The middle-order of Clayson and Spink played with their typical confidence and composure, being able to build from a firm foundation. Clayson (28) fell just before the end, looking for a spectacular hit (with the added pressure of knowing he was already late for a prior dinner engagement) and missing to leave his stumps scattered. But that allowed Stenner to lead the triumph with his trademark (and copyrighted) leg-side paddle to stroke the ball to the boundary and victory.

A 6-wicket victory was celebrated in the pub afterwards. There was much discussion about man-of-the-match. Did Spink or Clayson deserve it? For their complete all-round performances. Or Bryden? Who bowled a magnificent spell and took the catch of the season. But, for my money, it was Chappell. His innings banished the horrid memories of last year’s batting collapse, and set up the win when the bowling was most fearsome while the pressure was the greatest.